This is not a new thought, but it truly blows my mind how normalized/desirable abusive, controlling, cruel & inappropriate behavior is presented in mainstream narratives of romance.

Love is not proved by competition. You don’t win someone’s heart by “beating” someone else to the punch.

Love is complicated. It’s messy. It’s imperfect. It’s both humbling and sometimes banal in its everyday-ness. It does not fit a grand narrative. It is not about locking your loved one away. It is not about putting your loved one on a pedestal. It is not about mythologizing your loved one.

Love is not proved by gifts, especially not the gifts you are compelled to buy by, like, Valentine’s Day. Gifts are ancillary.

It is about trust. You will fight sometimes. You will compromise sometimes. You will decide when that compromising becomes enough for you.

You will adore your partner because of their totality, because of their wholeness, not ‘in spite’ of imperfections – the imperfections are part of the whole, part of your partnership. Trying to fit your loved one to a model and a narrative, into an ideal, will always hurt and disappoint both of you.

Love is fluid…. ♥